Not everyone has the confidence to be a natural networker.

In fact, when asked, it is the one thing that people wish they were better at in business networking and social events. So how do you go about learning the tricks of meeting new people and getting on with them with confidence? Here are 7 important tips.

1. Conversational Openers

If you want to strike up a conversation with someone you don’t know, perhaps at a social function, the best starting point is to talk about their number one subject – them. Your first question should not be too open that they don’t know where to start, nor too closed that you don’t get much free information in their reply. A good format to use is the statement-plus-question format, as in “You look new here. Can I help you?”

2. Keeping a Conversation Going
If someone is willing to keep a conversation going with you, you’ll get some free information from them that you should pick up on. For example,
You:”I see from your name tag that you work for a charity. Are you based here?” Them: “No, I’m based in LA. But I’m abroad a lot.”You: “That must be interesting. What countries do you travel to?”

3. Active Listening
The technique of listening for “free information”, picking up on it, and then moving a conversation on with it shows that you are listening actively to others. When you listen actively and with empathy, you immediately make yourself more attractive to others. A conversation then becomes a sort of dance, with one person leading and the other one following.

4. Positive Feedback
Once you’ve entered into conversation with someone while networking, the exchange can move up a gear if you give positive feedback to the other person. The trick is to do it without flattery or pretence. This can be a comment from you about something that the other person tells you by way of free information. When you comment positively, you are seen as sympathetic, understanding, and likeable.

5. Safe Disclosure
People don’t reveal too much about themselves in social situations unless they feel safe. Disclosing facts, then views, and then feelings is a gradual process. One way to make progress with self-disclosures is to go at the other person’s pace, only revealing personal information at the rate they do. When people move from cold facts through shared views to open feelings, they are establishing a bond of trust between you and them.

6. Presenting Yourself
To be more attractive to others, learn some tricks of self-presentation.

First, be specific about yourself. Not, “I’m a technician” but “I’ve just started at the hospital as a technician”.

Second, don’t paint a perfect picture of yourself, add a few flaws. Not, “I was top of my year” but “I didn’t do too well at first but then I had a great teacher who helped me become top of my class”.

Third, paint word pictures to describe your feelings. Not, “I was nervous” but “My knees were knocking”. These techniques add human warmth to your conversations and make you more likeable.

7. Avoiding Controversy
The sure-fire way to kill a new friendship dead is to take opposite sides on a controversial topic. If the conversation turns to a controversial issue, don’t take a stand until you hear the other person’s point of view. In reply, put both sides of the case and you’ll sound fair and wise. Later on, when they know you better, you can share your own point of view.

It is one of the facts of life that the more confident you are in social situations, the more successful you will be in making new friends and business contacts while networking. Just be cautious – you never want it to come off as over-confidence.

Follow the 7 tips above – you’ll see that business networking can really work to your advantage and you’ll hit the right note every time.

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

Unless you’re in retail, you might think the holiday season from Thanksgiving to the New Year is a big fat distraction to your sales effort. Today, I’d like to let you in on a little secret.

Instead of taking a break on your marketing during the holiday season, if you get into the spirit of the season you can party your way to success. Here’s how.

This past weekend, I was at an open house, the food was abundant and Bloody Marys and coffee (which is what I drank) being served. As usual, I met a handful of new people including, in this case, Bill the Managing Director of a firm that markets their investment services to pension funds and wealthy investors.

With $1.7 billion under management, the firm is successful, but in Wall Street terms is still considered small.

I’m always interested in learning what others do to make a living and I peppered Bill with a host of questions about his firm and of course I asked a few about what they were doing to attract clients.

In those few minutes I learned a lot about diversified hedge fund portfolios and risk management and in return Bill wanted to know what I did. He wanted to know how his firm could use the Internet to generate more leads and grow their business.

I shared a few ideas and before we left Bill handed me his card and asked that I call him so he could put me in touch with his marketing director.

See how simple it is?

To generate a lead, just get people talking about themselves, something everyone loves to do. And in return they’ll ask you about what you do.

When they do, don’t just give them a label, but instead demonstrate your expertise by giving them some tips and ideas so they can see how you could help them.

You see now why I wasn’t drinking Bloody Marys?

I wanted to remember who I’d met, what we’d talked about and to follow up.

Now, get out there and make sure to have fun this holiday season, and instead of pitching your services, get people to ask you about how you can help them and of course follow up after the holiday party.

FYI, if you’d like me to personally help you grow your business, I have 2 spaces available in my one-on-one mentoring program.

Apply here >>

To your success,

-Charlie

P.S. Simply striking up a conversation and expressing an interest in others is a sure way to generate leads and new business every day of the year, not just over the holidays. And it works whether you’re on a plane, the ski lift (where I’ve gotten a ton of leads) and practically anywhere you meet people.

Want more clients?

Start here >>

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

Are you not getting the action you want from LinkedIn? A great LinkedIn profile is more than just a resume, a summary and some recommendations.

Your LinkedIn profile can be a powerful sales and marketing tool with just a little work. Here’s how to create a profile that really stands out so people are excited to connect with you.

Optimizing your LinkedIn profile is free and not so hard to do, using the LinkedIn tools under “more” in the menu bar.

Look for “My Applications” in the “more” menu, followed by the Application Directory. “Get More Applications” at the bottom of the list provides even more marketing resources to supercharge your LinkedIn profile.

You can also start from the “Add Applications” link when you “Edit your Profile.”

WordPress or Blog Link: use one of these Applications to link your personal or company blog to your Profile. When a new item is posted on your blog, it automatically appears on your Profile.

Amazon Reading List: tell people which books you have read and which books you liked. This will not only give them a better perspective of the person you are, but help them to discover interesting books for themselves!

Events: if you are organizing or attending an event, mention it on your Profile. In this way you can promote your own event and let people know where they can meet you in person. LinkedIn is a great tool to make live meetings possible, not a replacement for face-to-face business networking!

Box.net files: share interesting information with other people. This information could be free tips, white papers or poll results. Always make sure there is value for the reader, don’t make it a “hard sales” document. Share your expertise (or that from your organization) so people know what you are an expert in. Build relationships with people first – the sales will follow.

SlideShare: use Powerpoint slides (or a Word or PDF document) to share interesting tips and insights with other people. Again, don’t make it a sales pitch. A bonus effect of using this Application might be that your SlideShare presentation ends up very high in Google or other search engines. Great publicity at no cost!

Google Presentation: use Google Presentation in combination with YouTube to show a movie in your Profile. This alone will make your Profile stand out from the rest!

To your success !

© 2010 Jan Vermeriren

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

As I mentioned in my October 4 post – How to Expand and Nurture Your Small Business Network – the secret to success, according to Jordan Adler, author of Beach Money, is to grow your business network and stay in touch with the people in it. Last time I gave you some tips about how to grow your small business network. Here are some great ideas for staying in touch.

Check-in with a phone call just to let someone know you’ve been thinking about them or you saw something that would interest them.

Send a “Thinking of You” card or a birthday card to let them know they’re on your mind.

Send a personalized thank-you note to show appreciation and get remembered. A note about notes from Bob Burg, author of Endless Referrals: Thank you notes should be friendly, simple and brief without a hint of a sales pitch.

Send a card to compliment or congratulate for a promotion, an award, a great advertisement, a new menu, great service, etc.

(Check out SendOutCards, a tool that allows you to go online, select a card, type a message and click send. The company prints it, stamps it and sends it in the US mail.)

Schedule a short meeting at a coffee shop. Face-to-face meetings are an effective first step to get to know someone better. Send a card that says, “Let’s meet for coffee. I’ll buy.” Include a pre-paid gift card to a local coffee house in your greeting card.

Send an article you’ve written — a great way to develop trust and establish credibility.

Send an article you’ve read, with a brief note about why it made you think of your contact.

Send information about an exciting new find. When you come across a new product, service or business that you think is the cat’s meow, let your contacts know. Send along some information about your new find with a note about why you’re impressed.

Give a referral or make an introduction to another member of your network — then facilitate the connection between the two individuals with a phone call or email.

Remember to keep your contacts informed of all that’s new in your business including upcoming events, educational workshops and new offerings.

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

Over the last couple of months I’ve been talking to my son about looking for a new job. You know, trying to give him some guidance without being the pushy Dad.

Right out of college his first job (big surprise!) was in online marketing, and it’s been a great starter job. But now, two years later, I’m thinking it’s time for him to move up the ladder and find a new, more challenging job. Marketing seems like a good fit. You know how Dads can be.

I’ve been working on him to get out there and network, make connections, and see what positions are available. And I know he thinks he doesn’t have any connections, being just two years out of college and all.

So just for fun I did a quick search on my favorite networking tool, LinkedIn.com.

First I selected the advanced search function in the top right-hand corner. Then I selected location (New York City), the industry area (marketing), and 1st and 2nd level connections. Under school I typed in Hamilton, the college my son graduated from.

What’d I find?

Over 160 alumni of my son’s school — people who’d be more than likely to talk to him — work in marketing and advertising in New York City where he lives. And of course each of them probably knows dozens of others in the field.

With just a little effort my son could find more job opportunities than he’d know what to do with, and learn a ton about his field.

Whether you’re looking for a job, or want to grow your business by connecting with new clients, LinkedIn.com is one of the most powerful tools out there. And it offers most of its functions for free.

Want to learn the secret to making this incredible tool work for you to find a job or grow your business?

My colleague, Jan Vermeiren, author of How to REALLY use LinkedIn, is hosting a free webinar on  Tuesday, December 21. And I strongly recommend you sign up.

I’ve included the link below, and before you click on it, I’ve got to tell you Jan is not a sales person. His sign-up page doesn’t sell and only gives a rough idea of the value he provides. But I know from interviewing Jan that he knows LinkedIn inside and out. His free webinar is a must attend for everyone in business.

Use this link to register and put LinkedIn to work for you. >>

- Charlie

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

In his book, Beach Money, Jordan Adler writes, “Your success in business will largely be determined by two things:

1.   The number of contacts in your contact manager

2.   The quality of your relationships with the people in your contact manager

Imagine what would happen to your business or your career if you made meeting new people and nurturing your relationship with them a daily priority?

According to Jordan, the formula for doing so is simple.

1. Add one or two new people to your contact manager every day.
When you set this as your intention you become aware of opportunities to meet new people and collect business cards wherever you go. Make it a habit to add new people to your contact manager as soon as you meet them. Then, start building that relationship right away by sending a “nice to meet you card.”

I use a fabulous follow-up service called SendOutCards for this. This tool allows me to go online, select a card, type a message and click send. The company prints it, stamps it and sends it in the US mail for me. Check it out at www.sendoutcards.com/28479.

2. Get to know the people in your small business network – not just what they do for a living, but their personal interests, hobbies and talents.
Let them also know who you are and what you like to do.

3. Stay in touch with the members of your small business network with phone calls, cards, social media and emails.
Use your contact manager as a tool to keep track of people’s interests, goals and your past conversation with them so that future contact has continuity and significance.

4. View your contact manager as an opportunity to “give back”.
Each day ask your self what you can do to add value to the life of someone in your contact manager. Do something positive every day for at least one member in your network.

- Colleen

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

A few years ago, having just set out as an E-Newsletter consultant, I got together for dinner with my old friend Jack. At the time, Jack had been an independent consultant for about ten years, and I knew he’d have a good perspective on what worked and what didn’t in launching a business.

I learned a lot over dinner, and by the time we ordered coffee I was feeling pretty energized about my business vision and my prospects for success. That is, until Jack started talking about “networking.”

“You have to attend a minimum of two small business networking meetings a week if you want any hope of building a business,” he advised me. “You go to the meetings, you look for the prospects, you work the room and you `press the flesh.’ That’s the way it’s done.”

I took this as very bad news. First of all, it scared the hell out of me. On my own personal scale of, “terrifying experiences to avoid,” I rank “working a room” somewhere between having more children and being trapped in an elevator with Donald Trump.

Secondly, I’m just not that good at connecting cold with people I don’t know. I barely know how to press my own flesh, let alone that of a complete stranger.

So when I confessed to Jack that my marketing approach was instead to, “attract clients to me by sitting in my office and cranking out useful, interesting, targeted E-Newsletters in my area of expertise,” he looked at me as if I had just revealed plans to perform my own dental work.

Now several years later, I’ve learned a few things.

First, Jack’s recommendation is not unique. In fact, it’s part of the standard lore of professional service marketing: If you want clients you need to be out there networking at meetings.

Second, Jack’s recommendation is just plain wrong. Wandering around local business events in the hope of meeting future clients is about the least efficient use of your marketing time and money that I can imagine. It’s the sole practitioner equivalent of sending out hundreds of resumes in the hope of finding a job. It may feel like something’s happening, but the hit rate is exceedingly low.

Instead, I recommend (big surprise) an E-Newsletter. Here are three reasons why:

1. An E-Newsletter is more targeted. Even if there were a potential client at the meeting, the odds of the two of you hooking up are small. You first have to wade through lots and lots of people who aren’t a potential match, many of whom often turn out to be other small businesspeople trying to get you to buy their services (a situation which my friend Betsy likes to describe as, “all ants and no picnic”).

Your E-Newsletter by contrast, includes only those who have a self selected interest in your topic, and the likelihood of one of these people hiring you is much higher than with a randomly chosen member of the business community.

2. An E-Newsletter is more efficient. The problem with face-to-face networking is that it requires the presence of your face; you can only physically get in front of so many people. An E-Newsletter on the other hand can be shared and forwarded by an unlimited number of people, and as a result (pay attention, this is important)it does its job without your even being there. Most of my new clients are people I’ve never even heard of, who contact me after getting a hold of my newsletter and reading it over a period of time.

3. An E-Newsletter is more. A quality E-Newsletter is much more than just a proxy for the exchange of business cards at a meeting. It positions you as a thought leader; it serves as content you can submit and have published elsewhere; it’s acts as a tool that others can use to accurately describe what you do. It’s archivable; it’s searchable; it’s scaleable; it’s trackable and it’s interactive. You get the idea.

Bottom Line: I’m 100% behind the idea of building a network and systematically staying in touch with as many people in that network as possible. I’m also in favor of attending business meetings — as a means of staying educated, keeping in touch or simply putting on some nice clothes once in a while and getting out of the office.

But in terms of building a client base, I think it’s time we put this piece of conventional wisdom out of its misery. Until then, I’ll be hiding in my office — avoiding The Donald and awaiting your call.

- Michael

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

You have made a Profile on LinkedIn, but never have given real thought what to write so potential customers or other people who might be interested in your Profile can find you? Or when they have found you that they are interested in contacting you and start a business relationship?

Then apply the 6 tips:

1. Name: since LinkedIn is website for business networking, use your own name and not a “nick name” you would use on other websites.

2. Picture: use a professional picture and not a holiday picture of yourself in bikini or swimming trunks or with 10 cocktails in front of you. A recent headshot where you gently smile is perfect for LinkedIn. Firstly this helps people to recognize you when they meet you in person and secondly it shows you take networking on LinkedIn seriously.

3. Professional Headline: this is the most important part of your LinkedIn Profile. The reason? This is what people see when they search and also what is put next to a comment of yours in a Discussion or an Answer.

If you want to be found by others on LinkedIn and on the web, use words they use to search with when they are looking for someone with your expertise. If the title on your business card is Marcom Director, but people search for Vice President Marketing or Communication Manager, chances they will find you, decrease dramatically.

4. Public Profile: if you want people to find you when they use your name in a search action on LinkedIn or via Google or another search engine, make sure you modify this link and replace the number/letter combination with your name.

5. Summary: Professional Experience and Goals- when you write more than two lines of text, make sure it looks nice visually. For example use bullets. Also don’t write too much copy because people won’t read it. Focus on the results you have obtained, not on the function you had. That is more attractive to the reader.

When you talk about yourself, use ‘I’ and not ‘He’ or ‘She’. The latter looks like an advertisement. This causes more dislike than attraction. When you have a conversation with someone, you also don’t talk about yourself as ‘he’ or ‘she’. Consider your Profile as a virtual you who answers questions like ‘What do you do? What is your expertise? What are you willing to share?’

6. Summary Specialties: this is the place to share the skills and experience you have acquired during your professional career. If you have a certification like Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer, this is the place to share that. Also use abbreviations when they are frequently used. In this example that should be MCSE.

The next 12 tips to optimize your LinkedIn Profile can be found in the next articles.

- Jan

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

In life, we all try to get things from each other; that’s how the world works and has always worked. From ancient times, we have been a people who belonged to tribes and clannish groups. We built societies in which we lived, worked and raised families together.

In these societies, each member had specific roles that he/she performed and contributed for the benefit of the group. As a part of life, we gave to and helped each other. And, we also received.

Networks operate on similar principles. When it comes to networking, an implied promise exists that “If you help me, I’ll help you.” This implied promise is the bond upon which networks and societies are built. Without the assurance of reciprocal help, many network members would not give. In networking, reciprocating, returning favors and giving back is not merely expected, it’s demanded; it’s the price you pay to be a network member.

“In a competitive environment, when we use and exploit each other and take everything we possibly can from network resources, we create a non-sustainable resource that collapses on itself because people feel used,” Bernhard Dohrmann, co-founder of IBI Global, Inc., explains.

“In a cooperative network, you reward everyone who helps you appropriately for the degree and level of the help received. Sometimes, it’s a thank you or a gift and sometimes it’s stock, fees or money. There should always be a reward for a contact that made a benefit to you. If you have a benefit, you should give a reward of one kind or another including recognition. Those are sustainable networks that will not collapse on themselves, they will always supernetwork and expand during your lifetime.”

Network members are realists. They understand that most requests have more than one motive. They know that the reason given may not be all there is. They also know too well that many good intentioned individuals don’t or can’t follow through and deliver what they promised.

Realists accept the fact that folks get busy, face other demands and simply forget. What they won’t abide; however, is repeated, out-and-out exploitation by those whom they have helped because networking involves giving and taking, not exploiting.

• You can’t always be the connectee; you must also be the connector.
• You can’t always be the taker; you must also give.
• To build a successful network you must be prepared to give at least two or three items for every one you receive.
• Better yet, don’t count, just give!

Give generously; don’t skimp. If you expect to receive more than you give, you’ll be bitterly disappointed. Sure, it you may get away with being a skinflint once, twice or even several times, but sooner or later people will catch on, feel abused and avoid you. And if you get anything, it will be drastically less than you gave and probably more than you deserve.

Train yourself to spot leads or opportunities for your network partners. To identify leads for partners requires you to understand their needs and how these needs can be best filled.

Think of networks as friendships. Your connection to network members is a bond built on the same basic principles as friendship. They are:

• Helping
• Sharing and
• Trusting

Both networks and friendships are intended to be long lasting and enduring, not just fleeting or hit and run contacts. A network, like a friendship, will work only if you’re asking, “What can I do for you? It will not work if you’re only asking, “What can I get from you?”

Savvy players know that networking fields are seldom level. The rich, powerful and famous are usually better connected and endowed. They have more clout than others, especially newcomers just starting out. So, most beginner networkers must try harder, be more accommodating, more assertive and seize every initiative.

Instead of waiting to be asked for a favor from that powerhouse who gave you help, find resources that he/she could use and connect them with your benefactor. To be a good network partner, you must help, help, help. And when you’re tired, help some more!

- Rick

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..

LinkedIn is a very powerful tool which allows account managers, business owners and sales reps to get results fast. However there are some characteristics which could possibly negatively impact your results if you don’t know them or don’t take them into account.

This is the top 7:

1.Send invitations to strangers. If you send an invitation to potential customers (or other people) you have never met and 5 of them click on “I Don’t Know this Person”, your options to connect with someone are drastically limited. You can only invite someone when you know their email address.

A remark: a number of women change their last name when they marry. A consequence could be that old classmates don’t recognize them and click on “I Don’t Know this Person”. If you are in this situation, add your maiden name.

2. Send impersonal invitations.  The standard invitation of LinkedIn is “Hi, I’d like to add you to my network”. This is an impersonal invitation. The consequence could be that people you already have a relationship with and especially the ones you want to build a relationship with are offended. So always give a personal touch to your invitations!

3. Add a holiday picture to your Profile. LinkedIn is a website for professional contacts. If you place picture of yourself in swimming trousers with 10 cocktails in front of you, you won’t be taken seriously by potential customers. Tip: use a headshot and smile gently.

4. Abuse of Answers. If you abuse Answers to sell your products or services, other LinkedIn users can “flag” your Profile. If you have a few “flags”, your question will be removed. If you do this a few times the option to ask questions can be removed.

5. Inappropriate behavior. If you are too pushy or behave inappropriately in any other way, people can “flag” your Profile, which can lead to canceling your subscription.

6. Everybody in the chain can read all messages of an Introduction. If you send someone an invitation to connect via ‘Get introduced through a connection’ you always have to write two messages: one of the final recipient and one for your first degree contact. Be aware that everybody who is in the “chain” towards the final recipient can read both your messages.

In practice this means that your first degree contact can read your message to him and the final recipient, that the second degree contact can read your two messages and the message from your first degree contact to him and that the final recipient can read your two messages, the message from your first degree contact to your second degree contact and from the second degree contact to him.

So always be professional in the messages you send whether it is an introduction request from yourself or whether you forward a message from someone else.

7. Including your email address in your name. This is a strategy that is applied by the so called LIONs (LinkedIn Open Networkers) and other people who want to have as many connections as possible. If that is what you want, you can do that. However be warned that this goes against the LinkedIn User Agreement.

As far as I know LinkedIn hasn’t banned anyone who did this, but they have the right to do so. Next to that, you can also turn off potential customers who are more keen on building a small network of people they know very well. They also might think you won’t be able to make time for them when they need you since you are spending so much time on LinkedIn.

- Jan

©2012All Rights Reserved by Charlie Cook or Blog Post Author..