Wow!
This is fascinating. I’ve been having the same problem, ever since I started working-period.
I’m only 24 and Ive noticed that most my female peers have the same insecurities. I was sure it’s only because we’re young and have a lot to learn.
The truth is, my (capable) male friends don’t have these problems. Whenever I hit a professional mile-stone of this sort, I consult with my spouce, brother and father (how Fruidian..hehe). They are all capable men, who know theire s@#t, and I’m always amazed at the things they know. Sometimes it’s something as simple as the right words. I’ve smacked myself on the forhead and ask “why didn’t I think of it!?!” so many times).
There’s an awful truth about all this ranting: Why don’t I consult my mother, my girlfriends? They are all capable, intelligent women, and yet they are not knowlegable in these things. I have no female role-model for business behavior.
What about you, girls?

It’s the solution that people pay for. Here’s the solution my clients pay for. I simply give them a task and then we schedule the next call to review the results.

What happens?

Usually the morning before the call, my client, in this case Kathy, follows up and gets paid. Having a mentor, one that holds your feet to the fire and makes helps you discover how easy it is to ask for the fees you deserve and get paid and holds you accountable works.

So I’ve been searching out and reading e-books by gurus about adjusting one’s own attitude toward money. It’s all very psychological, but extremely important, to value yourself, your time, your knowledge, and your skills. One should take for granted that one’s abilities and effort are worth real money. Why should everyone but yourself eat the fruit of your own tree?

So, Charlie, whatcha gonna pay me for this post? Just kidding. I already get so much out of your e-mails to me. Many thanks to you.

Suzanne.

Trouble is, it IS a balancing act, as Andrea says, but we’ve gotten years of training in doing the free part, maybe as much as an hour in training why to charge fairly for what we do.

How do we even the scales? How do we not feel mean charging someone we know, and probably like, what our service is really worth?

This is a very deep vein worth exploring, by business schools and social scientists, if no one else.

Thanks for bringing this up Charlie; it’s obviously an issue that affects everyone whether they realize it or not.

Alden

That’s me, too, and an issue I’m dealing with daily – I’m in web design too, and have done the same sort of thing as the client you mention.

Part of the problem is that I’m very sympathetic to people who are trying to establish a business on a shoestring, because I’ve been there. Women tend to be more relationship-oriented and empathetic. This is not actually a weakness on a spiritual or personal level, but as you point out, it makes it harder to ask for money.

Gradually, as I become more appreciative of my skills and knowledge, I’m learning to set a higher value on the time I put toward building a client’s business.

Web design entails a constant learning curve, however, and I’m often having to distinguish between learning time and client time when doing something new. The boundary between feeling competent and confident vs. not being sure of oneself can be fuzzy.

Being a women probably enters into that equation, though I’ve known lots of men who deal with the same issues.

Thanks for raising this point. It gives me some courage.

Your wife is 100% dead on. I’m grappling with this challenge right now, in fact.

Having just recently discovered that I can actually be paid for the help that I lend people with writing copy and creating graphics (and people appreciate being able to do the paying), I’m really having a hard time with the pricing side of things.

Something my Dad said to me years ago keeps me working on a win/win solution (yes, I have to win too!) — he said, “Under pricing your product is a disservice to your customer… you won’t be around to provide it for very long and that is an even greater inconvenience than having to pay the market rate now”.

Women aren’t raised to value their time and energy in terms of cash — in fact, given all of the hats that we often end up wearing where the ‘prize inside’ is NOT measured in dollars, we have to find a way to find genuine joy and contentment in the ‘less-tangible’ rewards or go plum crazy.

It’s a balancing act we each have to figure out …

I appreciate your post!

Make it a great day,
Andrea

Your wife is 100% dead on. I’m grappling with this challenge right now, in fact.

Having just recently discovered that I can actually be paid for the help that I lend people with writing copy and creating graphics (and people appreciate being able to do the paying), I’m really having a hard time with the pricing side of things.

Something my Dad said to me years ago keeps me working on a win/win solution (yes, I have to win too!) — he said, “Under pricing your product is a disservice to your customer… you won’t be around to provide it for very long and that is an even greater inconvenience than having to pay the market rate now”.

Women aren’t raised to value their time and energy in terms of cash — in fact, given all of the hats that we often end up wearing where the ‘prize inside’ is NOT measured in dollars, we have to find a way to find genuine joy and contentment in the ‘less-tangible’ rewards or go plum crazy.

It’s a balancing act we each have to figure out …

I appreciate your post!

Make it a great day,
Andrea